So..being British is not always everything it is cracked up to be.Â Let’s face it, as a nation we have single handedly ruined the Burberry company product line by creating Chavs, were pretty successful at taking over the world, foisted our language everywhere….and didn’t complain overly when it was butchered by other nations Â We invented lager louts and beer culture, privatisation Real Ale.
We did give the world one of the first female heads of state….although it was Margaret Thatcher, so I am not sure it really counts.Â We have been responsible in large part to the creation of some of the worlds biggest sports…and then subsequently forgotten how to play any of them.
We invented the Stiff Upper Lip…I found this account of the invention process.Â “The patented Stiff Upper Lip was invented by Brigadier-General Hercules “Phil” McThighs in 1823 after a nasty mix-up in the preparation of one afternoon’s Tiffin. Although not that useful in the battlefield, McThighs’ batman Kate discovered that is was extremely useful during cunnilingus.Â General McThighs is reported to have died a year after this invention, reports say suffocation…”
Tim Berners-Lee is considered responsible for the creation of the WWW, so by association he is also responsible for the lack of productivity due to Facebook and Blogging.Â Due to political maschinations, we seem to be attributed responsibility for India being how it is….so it is our own bloody fault that there are so many call centers out there whenever we call our “local branch” of our “local bank”.
We gave the world Monty Python, Blackadder, The Hitchhikers Guide and many other great comedic genius….only to ruin it all with Allo Allo and Robins Nest.Â Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch…only to be undone by Revolver.
I am not sure if I can claim sarcasm and dry wit as ours, but noone else is any good at it, so I may aswell.Â We did manage to give Benny Hill to the Germans…so we don’t always ruin ourselves…
We sort of discovered America and Australia….sorry about that world.Â In fairness we were a curious bunch with a natural instinct to try and find stuff.Â Typically, we had no idea what to do with it when we did
Penicillin is one of ours…you are welcome promiscuous youngsters (and oldsters)…in the same arena…two British guys are listed on the patents for Viagra… Messrs Dunn and Wood!
Love them or hate them, you can’t deny the Beatles…but in fairness I can only apologise for the Spice Girls.
It isn’t all good though, we created Morris Dancing after all…
In writing this I realised that the saying is true, for every action there is an equal an opposite reaction.Â We have given some great things to this world….and some godawful stuff too.
Never forget though…we gave you the mini skirt…You are welcome
What has your country given the world?